The new

Finding out something I never knew would happen
Stuck now in a state of countless decisions
Where a world I didn't know could change so much
Can and would
But I can't find the right thing to do
Of course, it won't be easy nevertheless

This day

I am back on here after a long period of time to only discover that time changes a lot of things. I lost the love of my life and I am at a point in my life where I have to start making big decisions for myself. Knowing all these years that I don't get a lot of support about being an adult. Or maybe it's me, not asking for help from the other people.

Happiness

I am something else unimaginable, I am all over.
In my head, I am the closure. 
No more pain and no worry.
I am here for a reason and nothing in between.
Being myself is the best thing.
Not only for me but everyone around me.
I like to have friends around.
To be free and have some company.
I like to smile and sign up for peace. 
I want a bright future and I am working towards the best things for me.
New job, new life, new home, me for me.

Enraged

Sometimes I have no real reason to be here, but I am.

 Honestly, things should be easier for how much work I put in. 

But yet so much is so little. 

Nothing ever seems to be right and it makes me more and more present. 

I become enraged and more impatient when situations arise. 

But I reward it with silence. 

I don't usually act upon myself.

 Sometimes when I think what's best is to just up and leave. 

I don't care for most people's reactions. 

I am me and no one can change me.

I don't often act upon the things I say and do.

Something more takes over.